MY BODY IS SPEAKING
Hey beautiful people out there, beings with bodies, in bodies, as bodies,
however you experience yourselves right now.
I have this thing going on, where my body stops me in my doing mode,
becomes heavy, tired, like having a cold and wants to tell me something.
I just woke up from deep sleep. Still lying on the ground. I want to share this with you.
I'm used to listening to my body, to feel, to sense, to communicate, integrate this dimension of body in the whole picture. I love being in contact with the dimension of the body and the meeting point between body and consciousness, as lots of you know.
And still about every 2 months or this time it was a bit longer that I was happy healthy on my feet,
my body is stopping me in my usual thing and then I have to rest.
Very often in my past I would continue working anyways, so that I knew I would have enough money at the end of the month (the being self employed thing ... maybe you know that too?). So working out of fear of not earning enough and also because of wanting to be reliable towards you, my clients.
But honestly, it's now quite a few years ago that it was a real issue not having enough money.
It's not the case now and still I don't listen to my body and give her the rest, she needs.
This time ~ now ~ it is different. I went trough different processes during the past weeks and months and I realize now, what my body wants to tell me really. It is something that I am afraid of listening to.
It would involve stepping out and showing myself in a slightly different way. It would involve asking for more money for what I am sharing. It would involve, letting people know, that my work, what I'm really good at, what makes a real difference in peoples life is not being like a pure Alexander teacher anymore (whatever that meant in the first place).
Through my training as a gestalt therapist, the lots and lots of workshops, further trainings in different somatic and spiritual practices, through my constant dicovery and expIorations I needed to change the way I'm working. No, I didn't change it, it is actually just happening. In my workshops, meditations and retreats my multidimensional approach is clearly visible and also in my private sessions I integrate it more and more.
So what do I want to say? Something about a transitioning phase. Maybe you can relate to this: The former box doesn't quite fit anymore and the next state is not clearly visible yet. Middle ground.
I had this feeling a few times in my life. It was always at times, when I had to leave an old structure,
a job or a way of working that wasn't in alignment anymore.
When I had to stop teaching the violin, my ears where shutting down and a Tinnitus appeared back.
And there was a strong inner resistance.
Now, I get these constant little sicknesses every few weeks, where I feel so heavy that I just have to sleep a lot and rest. Since a while I know that there is something going on and I checked it in different ways,
also the physical plane, like checking my blood and these kinds of things.
And this time after having had some inquiries in the direction of my true calling,
I know this sickness is also very much related to not asking for the right amount of money and also not being fully visible with what I offer. So just by saying this and sharing this, it feels like the next step and might give you a transparent insight in my development.
I will continue working as "pure" Alexander teacher, but only to a certain extend.
So my Workshops, Retreats, Audios and the ~ let me call it for now *Holistic Body Sessions*
will just move more into the foreground.
What's the difference you migth ask?
These sessions are for you, if you truly want to reconnect with your essence, want to fully ground yourself in your body and at the same time in your selflove and your consciousness. I can also support you discover, what you are really here for to share essentially with the world. And how. The big "how" do we want to live. From where, connected with what?
Living from your unique essence and from love, be it while you are washing the dishes, talking to your child, resting, feeling lonely or sharing yourself in a wide range with the world. Doesn't matter.
And all my knowledge from these almost 20 years of Alexander Technique and other somatic,
conscious and spiritual work is the foundation to this offer.
The dimension of how I am within my Body ... the integration of this body principle
that can provide us with so much clarity. And joy!
Much Love,
Susanne
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All pictures by Ralf Hiemisch
